Once Upon A Cheese Curl
by PNEK MEKS
Summary: A wild tale about a day in the life of Kirby!


HEY!!! One more time!! 

Disclaimer: I own my hamsters, and my cats, and this little fuzzy thing, and some other stuff, nope...don't own nintendo's crap.

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ONCE UPON A CHEESE CURL

Once upon a cheese curl, there was a small, round, pink, puff named Kirby. He lived in a pineapple under the sea. Wait... scratch that, he lived in a small house in a happy forest filled with fruit trees. He loved to run around and act like an idiot. His favorite drink was beer and his favorite food was maximum tomatoes. Kirby had 3 friends. Their names were Mario, Link and Cheese. Wait... scratch Cheese and put in Pikachu. So, any who, Kirby was getting bored by himself. He had played all his video games, ate a hundred max tomatoes, drank 200 beers and sang every idiot song he knew. He was down right bore. "Time to go visit Cheese!" he said to himself and off he went to Pika's house. Pika was relaxing in her chair eating nachos. Mario, (Yes, just to let you know, they are married. Scary huh?), was in the kitchen making and eating pancakes. Kirby charged in and jumped on Pika licking her face. "Hey Cheese!" he shouted. Pika shoved him off and wiped her face clean. "Yuck! Kirby! I hope you DIE!" she screamed and gave him a good shock. "That feels good!" Kirby said. Pika gave up and walked into kitchen to get more nachos. Kirby followed her. "Hi Pancake Freak!" said Kirby to Mario. "Hi...gulp...Kirby." said Mario gulping down a pancake. Kirby sat down and started to get bored. "You guys are boring!" he told them. "Then...gulp...why don't you...gulp...go see Link...gulp...?" Mario said still eating pancakes. Kirby thought about it, (can he even think?), and shrugged his shoulders and headed off to see Link. Link was in his tree house giving his cow a bath. Navi was sitting on the couch eating mushy ice cream and watching cartoons. Kirby walked in and sat down on the couch after grabbing a beer. "Hello Linky Shlinky! Come and sit on granny's lap and have a beer!" said Kirby. Link finished cleaning his cow and walked over and sat down next to Kirby with a beer of his own. "So? How yah been chewin' gum?" asked Link. "Oh, I been pretty good, pretty good. How a 'bout you and Popcorn over there?" said Kirby. Navi flew away crying because she hated to be called Popcorn. Link shrugged he's shoulders. "okay," he answered. Kirby and Link sat there watchin' TV when Saria showed up. "Hey! Look Link! It's Elf Girl!" said Kirby. Saria laughed as Tattle and Tale flew in. "Where's Navi?" they asked in unison. "You mean Popcorn? She flew into the back room," said Kirby as the two fairies went to find her. Saria walked over and sat down next to Link. Link pushed her away. "How many times do I have to tell you this? I don't like you! I wish you would burn! Now go away!" shouted Link as he sat back down to watch cartoons. Saria cried and ran away. "She'll be back tomorrow." said Link to no one particular. Kirby, who has a short attention span, was getting bored again and grabbed a beer from the frig and jumped out the window to go find someone to hang with. Kirby was cruisin' along on his star when he saw a large tree house below with a small monkey sitting on the porch. Kirby leaped off his star and landed on the monkey knocking him to the floor. "Hello monkey!" said Kirby. The monkey knocked Kirby off and started to scream at him. "You are a stupid thing! My name is Diddy Kong and this is me and Donkey Kong's house so scram!" said Diddy. "Who's this Donkey person you speak of? I she a Donkey?" asked Kirby very confused. "No! He's not a donkey! He's the king of Kongo Bongo! He's a Gorilla you stupid mush for brains!" screamed Diddy angrily. "Kongo Bongo?" said Kirby still quite confused. "Yes, Kongo Bongo. That's where you are right now," Diddy said reachin' for a banana. Kirby was getting hungry so he pulled out a rock, put some salt on it and shoved it up his nose. (Does he have a nose?) Kirby then saw a sparkly coconut through the window. "Ooo! What's that?" he said pointing at it. Diddy turned around. "That's the Crystal Coconut," said Diddy. Diddy then laid back in his chair and dozed off. Kirby snuck inside the house and up to the coconut. He saw a huge gorilla laying on the couch snoring. He picked up the coconut, shoved it in his mouth, leaped out the window, and took off on his star. By the time the Alarm system went off and the two lazy prime apes woke up, Kirby was long gone. He cruised along on his star wandering what to do with the coconut. He couldn't eat it cause it tasted yucky. So, he decided to take it to Toad, who always had a fondness of shiny stuff, to see if he could trade it for some nice cold beer. Kirby cruised along until he found a giant mushroom. He leaped down rang the door bell, and screamed, "Hi Toad! Open up and let me in!" "Who is it?" said Toad peering out his window. Kirby did a freakish dance. Toa cringed and debated letting him in. Last time he ate Toad's couch and threw the television into a wall. Kirby got sick of waiting and crashed through the window falling on top of Toad. "Hi Mushroom Head!" Kirby said to Toad. Toad pushed him off and stood up dusting himself off. "Hello Kirby," Toad said a little agitated, "What brings yah here? Gonna eat my chair this time? Or maybe you'll throw my toaster out the window? Hmm?" Kirby looked at Toad kind of confused. "No. I just wanted to trade this shiny coconut for a beer," Kirby said pulling out the Crystal Coconut. Toad's eyes went wide as he grabbed the coconut and huggled it. "Oh my! Where have you been all my life beautiful?" Kirby looked at Toad extremly confused as he walked into the kitchen to get a couple beers. He walked back out with two beers, one in each hand. Toad reached for one. "Thanks Kirby. I am a little parched," said Toad. Kirby pulled his hand back holding the beer close looking at Toad seriously. "My beer! Get your own!" he said and swallowed both beers, can and all. Toad looked at Kirby and screamed and cussed at him driving Kirby out of the house. "And don't come back!" Toad said slamming the door in Kirby's face. Kirby shrugged his shoulders and took off on his star. Kirby, bored once again with the world, was off seeking entertainment. He flew over a field and found a herd of colorful dots, or at least that's what it looked like from his star. He flew down and found a herd of Yoshis eating grass. Kirby looked at them and what they were doing. "Grass? Why would anyone eat grass?" Kirby said confused like always. "I mean, why not eat cheese? It tastes better then grass. There is something wrong with you guys!" Suddenly a few Goombas appeared and started to bark while chasing the Yoshis. Kirby felt bad for the Yoshis so he helped out the Goombas in their barking and chasing. When they were done, Kirby noticed that the Yoshis were in a pen and the Luigi was giving the Goombas treats. He wanted the treats, so he tackled all the Goombas stealing and eating their treats. Kirby sat there licking his fingers (does he have fingers?) clean. Luigi yelled at him. "What's da matter with you? You steal my poor Goombas' treats! What' da matter with you?" he said in a fancy Italian accent. Kirby looked up at him. "But...but...I was hungry!" he said starting to cry. Luigi felt bad and threw Kirby a treat but Kirby just kept on crying, after eating the treat of course. Luigi tried everything but nothing seemed to make Kirby happy. He finally gave up, pulled out a beer, and started to drink it. Kirby stopped crying and looked at the beer and started to drool. Luigi, who thought Kirby was looking at him, started to back up screaming, "No! No please! Please don't eat me!" Kirby started towards Luigi still drooling. Luigi started to cry and scream like a little girl. "Ahh! No! Get away!" Luigi cried in fear. Kirby walked up and took Luigi's beer gulping it down. "Ahh!" Kirby said as he wiped his mouth, "That was good!" Luigi sighed and wiped the sweat from his forehead. Bowser stepped out of the bushes with a camera. "That was too perfect! Wait till the guys see this! They'll laugh their heads off!" Bowser said and ran away. Luigi screamed, "Noooooooooooooooooooooooo-pant-oooooooooooooooooooooo!" Kirby shrugged and took off on his star, bored once again. He zoomed along on his star, not really caring where he was. Soon. without him noticing, he crossed the boundary between Nintendo and Playstation. He was still zooming along when something flew past him at a high speed. He stopped his star and looked around. Then, the thing flew back and hovered in front of him. "Sorry buddy. I was chasing a butterfly," said the thing. Kirby blinked, positive he had never seen the thing before. "Who are you?" Kirby asked. The thing looked at him. "I'm Spyro, the dragon. Who are you?" asked Spyro. Kirby opened his mouth, then shut it, thought, then answered. "Kirby! I think?" said Kirby. Spyro looked at him confused. He didn't know a Kirby, unless this was a new guy that Playstation came up with, but there wasn't anything on the bulletin board. "Where yah from?" Spyro asked Kirby. "Who? Me?" Kirby said. "Yes, you." Spyro said back. "Oh! I live over yonder at 13 Crazy Nut Lane. Why?" Spyro thought a minute. "What's the zip code?" he finally asked. "N64," answered Kirby. Spyro was shocked and then pulled out a megaphone shouting through it, "EMERGENCY! Nintendo Spy on Playstation grounds! All personnel...ATTACK!" Spyro, a strange bandicoot, a crocodile, and a lot of people with a ton of guns attacked Kirby. Kirby wasn't sure what to do so he pulled out a gun and threatened to shoot himself. They kept firing so he decided to am scram. When he got back across the boarder line, he collapsed to the ground and laid there. Then he got up, looked around, and noticed that everybody in Nintendo was surrounding him. He looked at Pika. "What's going on?" he asked. She growled at him. "Because of your stupid mistake, Playstation has declared war on us!" Kirby grinned. "COOL!" Diddy stepped forward. "No, not cool!" Link was getting frustrated. "Shut up people! We have a war to prepare for! If we're lucky, maybe Kirby will die in it. So, let's go and get ready!" he shouted. Everybody screamed, "YAH!" Kirby screamed, "EGGS!" They all left to prepare for war. -3 hours later- They all show up at the boarder line. The enemy stood on the other side. Suddenly, a shot rang out and the war was on! Everybody was engaged in conflict, all but Kirby. He was sitting in the middle of the battle field rollin' a rock across the dirt, singin', "I love rocks that roll! Put another beer in my hand now tender! I love rocks that roll! Won't yah come down and drink with me?" Link was running from a group of strange colored birds when he tripped over Kirby and fell face first into the dirt. Kirby saw the birds coming, got up, and ran away crying. "AHH! Chickens are taking over!" Kirby screamed as he ran. Link was left lying in the dirt getting pecked to death, when Jigglypuff jumped out of no where and sung them to sleep. "Thanks!" Link said. "No prob!" said Jiggly. The war raged on and on. Pika was doing a terrible job against most of her opponents. Diddy and Donkey Kong had teamed up, but weren't doing so good. Mario, Luigi, Toad, Princess Peach and Bowser were giving it all they had. Zelda was confusing the enemy by switching between herself and Sheik. The Goombas were chasing after Spyro hoping to kill him by eating his dragon fly. Suddenly, Kirby threw his arms up into the air and the war stopped. Kirby pulled them down and the war started. He threw his arms back up and the war stopped again. Kirby grinned. "Coo!" he said. He threw his arms up and down. "War off, war on, war off, war on, war off," he chanted. Someone threw a coconut at him and the war was on again. Suddenly, Nintendo started to loose. (Hold up! Is that right? No way! It can't be! It's true! No!) Out of no where, and elf that looked like Link, except he was wearing white and no hat, appeared drawing his really cool sword. "Have no fear! Cozumbob is here!" he shouted. Everybody cheered, except for Kirby who had fallen asleep. Link walked up to his brother. "Come on Cozumbob! Let's finish them!" The two pulled off the coolest attack ever and the war was over. Nintendo had won! (Phew! They had me scared for a minute!) Everybody in Nintendo raised Link and Cozumbob high and cheered them all the way home. The Playstation dorks were left picking up the pieces as they walked away grumbling. Kirby, who was asleep through the whole end of the war, woke up and looked around. "Gotta stop eating cheese at night," he said to himself and whistled for his star. He hopped on it and flew along. Finally, he got home as night began to fall. He leaped down, walked into his house, put on his pink jamies and nightcap, drank a few beers, and went to sleep. He slept all night dreaming of himself in a monkey/banana suit. 

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So whatcha think? Cool huh?? I though you'd like it! Bye now!


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